No, old age is not a bitch
Many women in their 70s and older often complain to me, “Old age sucks.”
Usually my response is, “Well, yes, old age can be a bitch, but it doesn’t have to be…” Have you heard the expression “Life is what you make of it”? It’s not just a saying, it’s true.
Old age can seem like a bitch due to poor health, loneliness, financial problems or you don’t look like you used to, but this is the reality: if you can still complain, you can change things. You may not be able to do much, but you can often do more than you think you can if you choose to TRY. Just the act of trying is energizing.
Let’s think about the things that are said to haunt older people, and what to do about it.
“I am a victim”: There may be more than a few of us who are do not compose lie, but if we’re smart enough to be on a computer, then we’re smart enough to smell a phishing scam from a mile away. Who in their right mind would respond to an email from Nigeria or anywhere else promising millions of dollars from a dead uncle (which we never had) if we sent $500 to remove a government lock on the money?
What to do instead: If you have $500 to throw away, buy a couple of McDonald’s shares and watch them grow. It’s easy to get started. Open an account with Schwab or another investment firm.
(Very early in life, when I was poor but hopeful, I invested $200 I couldn’t afford in McDonalds stock. They grew and continue to grow. I have given shares to my grandchildren and the shares are still worth much more than I paid. The price will go up. and it will go down, but as the chicken fryer TV commercial recommends: “Set it and forget it. No, its advancing age doesn’t mean it’s too late to buy it).
Loneliness: Many lonely older people looking for love enter a dating site with the expectation of finding a perfect match. Possible? Of course. Probable? No. Dr. Phil has aired more than a couple of shows demonstrating how older adults looking for love are getting the financial ride of a lifetime. It’s sad, but loneliness can lead to despair.
What to do instead: Volunteer to help others who are more emotionally needy than you. By giving of ourselves, we can find the love we want. We receive so many unexpected gifts when we help others.
Living life in memories: Many older adults have nothing but memories to keep them busy. They don’t realize that they can volunteer or get a job if they are mentally and physically competent. It doesn’t matter what the job is, as it provides emotional satisfaction.
I remember an episode of Shark Tank TV where a young woman was weaving purses for a business and looking for women to help. She went to a nearby retirement community and found a treasure trove of older women who loved to knit and were excellent paid employees. It was a win-win for everyone, but especially for retirees who found a new purpose in life. Not only that, but their personalities came back to life. They looked and felt better because they were useful. They were grateful to have received a “push” to get back into the flow of the “real world”.
What to do instead: Get a job, any job that takes you out of yourself. Leisure-oriented retirement is a government construct that leads to inevitable decline. Never discount the value of work for your mind and body. Use it or lose it.
Misery loves company: One of the many things I don’t like about retirement communities and government programs for seniors is that there are too many opportunities to find “misery loves company” companions. While it can promote a kind of camaraderie, it’s not healthy.
What to do instead: Develop your own “senior center” of like-minded rebels with a positive mindset, determined to survive and help each other overcome life’s obstacles, and embrace the perks of old age, and be of service to the “not members”.
Yes, in many ways, old age can be a bitch. It does not have to be like that. If you are mentally competent, there are so many things that can be done to make “old age” better and even joyous for yourself and others. Never think or believe that you are “too old” to do what your soul and psyche beg you to do. Be brave and be daring. You can do it!