how to heal your heart
We all experience severe heartbreak at some point in our lives. For many it occurs in childhood or adolescence, the time when we are most vulnerable. A cold mother, an absent father, being different from our peers in some way and ostracized for it – these are some of the reasons for the early feeling that something is wrong, inadequate and completely disappointed in us. For others, it happens later, when a spouse betrays our love and trust, a child is hurt, or our dream of making it in the world is shattered.
It happens sooner or later to everyone, but oddly enough, we tend to believe that other people have loads of money, great careers, excellent health, and are blessed with devoted spouses and perfect children. Although common sense tells us that this is not true, we behave as if it were. We hide behind our painted faces and empty sentences, as if our wounded heart is something strange and shameful that must be hidden at all costs. Even if we are the light of every party, our true selves never show up. We withdraw and tune out while telling pretty lies in appearance, word and deed. So our hearts shrink and harden, and we live lonely, inauthentic lives deep within the fortress we’ve built out of pride and fear.
From this point on, two things can happen: either we get depressed or cynical enough to believe that staying in this wasteland and turning to dust is our only option, or listen to the cries of our exiled hearts and become seekers. . If you belonged to the first group, you would not be reading this book. So, let’s begin the search for our true selves. In the following imaginative exercise, you will begin to restore the lost connection to your heart. You may feel some resistance as you read these words. Won’t this lead to an emotional breakdown or an eruption of hurt and anger? It depends on your intention.
If you want to explore your childhood or other serious emotional trauma, there are trained medical and psychological professionals to guide you through this delicate process.
What we want to accomplish here is to find and free our spiritual hearts. There is the heart, and there is the true heart. There is our “pink” heart, and there is our “golden” heart. Our heart is low, and our heart is high.
Low Heart Qualities: Passion, Extremes, Volatility, Attachment, Excitement.
High Heart Qualities: Compassion, Balance, Patience, Unity, Spirit, Soul.
Again, our intention is to connect with the higher, the spiritual heart. This can happen instantly, on the first try. If you do, it is a profound and inspiring experience, and you will recognize the level of truth instantly. You will realize that there is, behind your physically sick or emotionally broken heart, a heart that is completely upright, strong and wise. However, establishing this pathway could be a much longer process. You can connect to “pieces” of your heart at once. Perhaps you first experience an acute awareness of the imprisonment of your heart, or your inner space may be silent for a while. Take it easy. Whatever happens is the right thing for you right now.
EXERCISE: LISTEN TO YOUR HEART
Sit or lie down comfortably, making sure you are not disturbed. Close your eyes. Breathe. Chill out. If relaxation is not easy for you, visualize a thick, golden liquid collecting in your head. Slowly, very slowly, like molasses, it flows down your entire body, making it limp and heavy.
When you feel relaxed, shift your attention to your chest. Imagine breathing through your chest. Out. Out. Out. Do this as long as you want. When you are ready, gently focus your attention on your heart.
Your elevated heart, your true heart, your spiritual heart.
Now, and possibly for the first time, say hello to your true heart. Express your gratitude for their continued and life-giving service, their protection and guidance.
When you have established a connection, you may want to ask questions. So shut up and listen.
Listen to the voice of your heart. This voice can be expressed in words, in feelings, in images, in sounds, or simply as “knowing”. Learning to recognize the unique voice of your heart can take time, so relax if you can’t “get it right” at first.